Hello everyone! My name is Katherine Duarte. I am 24 years old and happily married with a one year old son. The reason I made this blog was because it was truly a vision that God put in my heart to pursue. I’ve struggled with depression for many years always feeling unworthy as if I’ve had no purpose in this world of turmoil. After getting married and having baby, I felt I wasn’t enjoying my marriage and motherhood the way everyone else was. I was constantly comparing myself my life to others. I knew I loved my husband and being a mother, but I couldn’t show it. I walked around feeling defeated.
I began to turn my heart back to the only thing in this world that could give me answers. The Lord! I began to pray for God to show me what my calling was because I was tired of walking around feeling unworthy—just a stay at home mom. Man oh man did I open a beautiful door. I prayed for about a month. One weekend while talking to my sister about a post that my best friend shared, I realized that when it comes to motherhood and being a wife, I don’t play. The next weekend, we had some friends staying with us. Before they came, God spoke to my heart and said, “Talk to her and before they leave you pray for them.” I thought to myself, “Lord, how can I talk to someone when my life itself is a mess? I am a mess, depressed, not perfect. Who am I to talk to her?”
That night, I went to bed really confused and full of anxiety. I couldn’t sleep questioning, “Why me Lord?” Half way through the night, I woke up and started praying for her and her family. I wasn’t going to talk to her because I didn’t want to offend her or think I was being nosy. But God had other plans.
During the day, our husbands went to the grocery store and I remember sitting down talking to her about something random. Suddenly, I began to talk to her with a voice of authority. It was at that point that I realized God was using me to minister her. When I looked up, she had tears running down her face and said, “Kat you don’t understand but I needed to hear this.” It felt so good to do what God was telling me to do.
In the bible, second Timothy 1:7, it states: “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity but of power, love and discipline.”
Later that night, my husband and I watched the movie, War Room (which by the way I truly recommend to go see). In one of the scenes, they said, “Only God can give you the joy you need.” That phrase really touched my heart because I felt like I was trying to accomplish all this before a certain age so that people wouldn’t judge me for being a stay at home mom. I realized no matter what I did, I would never truly be happy because I was trying to fill a void in my heart where only God belongs. I was allowing the enemy to talk down to me and take my joy.
To be honest, even starting this blog was something I contemplated until I realized all these years I’ve been allowing the enemy to take what God has given me. But NO MORE! I don’t know what God has planned for me, but what I do know is I am exactly where he wants me to be. I am going to start enjoying it. I WILL NO LONGER allow the enemy to take the promises that God has given me. This fire He gave me will not be put out because, in the name of Jesus, I rebuke it.
Ephesians 3:12 says, “Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God’s presence.” I don’t know what God is trying to do with this page. But if he is going to use me to lift someone’s spirit by speaking about my life or posting a scripture or a song, then I am going to do it.
I know what it is to be in a dark place in my life but God restored me. I want you to know today that you are not alone. The Lord, our heavenly Father, loves us more than we can imagine. He even sent his only son to die on the cross for us. I am not perfect and will never be. But because of his grace, love and mercy for me, I am here today able to type this for you—to have hope and know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. That tunnel is through Jesus Christ himself. Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you whever you go.” –Español